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Years ago, I received some sage advice from an older curator: every letter needs four paragraphs. Paragraph 1: Flatter yourself. Paragraph 2: Flatter the person you’re writing to. Paragraph 3: Flatter yourself and the person you’re writing to—link your fortunes. Paragraph 4: Ask for what you want. My mentor explained that letter writers routinely omit one of these paragraphs (perhaps mistakenly taking it for granted), bewildering their reader. They fawn over them, but themselves seem unworthy. Or they sing their own praises exclusively. Or they fail to connect. Or they forget to even ask for what they want, missing their own point. It struck me that this four-paragraph approach was good not only for writing letters but for relating to others in general—being empathetic while hanging onto your self, and considering the stake they may have in what you want (or not).
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[IMAGE: Peter Tyndall]
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